Pick any struggle you have. Literally any one of them. Now sit with the fact that there is someone who is currently or has struggled with the exact same thing or at least something very similar. They might not be on the other side of the world, they might even be the stranger sitting next to you in the coffee shop.
You are special my friend, but the things keeping you up at night are not as unique as you think. Lots of people are suffocating financially. Struggling with parenthood. Addicted to something or in recovery. Can’t lose the weight. Can’t find the career they want. Going through divorce. Trying to start a business. Setting boundaries with family. Working on finding new friends.
I’m not saying this to discount your experience. This shit is hard and whatever you’re working through is valid. But the challenges you face in life are not a permanent diagnosis. They are temporary and there are solutions at your fingertips and all around you. The only way these struggles become permanent and a part of your identity is if you let them.
My advice? Work smarter, not harder. Stop reinventing the wheel as if you are the first person to ever face this particular challenge. Stop hiding and go make yourself visible.
I am taking an online course right now about Manifestation called To Be Magnetic. I maxed out one of my credit cards to pay for this membership because I noticed(Step 1 in my Slow It Down Model: download here) I have some serious limiting beliefs when it comes to the career and financial stability I truly desire. I trusted my experience as valid(Step 2), found gratitude (Step3) and made myself relevant by investing in this course (Step 4).
One of the concepts Lacy Phillips discusses in this course is surrounding yourself with expanders. Expanders are people who have what you want or people who are successfully living out the life you envision for yourself. Seeing these people before your eyes is sending a signal to your subconscious - “hey look, this is possible!”
I love the concept of expanders. I have always been a huge believer and can point back to times in my life where expanders have in fact expanded my ability to achieve what I want.
In my opinion, this is something we as human beings generally sleep on a bit. It’s so wild and ironic to me that in a world so populated and so interconnected, it’s so easy to feel so alone and so disconnected.
There are so many good people in this world ready to lend a hand. Give yourself the chance to be heard and maybe even helped. If you want to be seen, you have to make yourself visible. Then when you have it figured out one day, maybe you’ll be in the position to turn around and help the next person to face this challenge.
I was watching a documentary about Woodstock and I was cracking up at the clever concept they had for one of their medical tents. If someone took drugs and was having a bad trip, they’d go to a tent where there would be people there to comfort you and help you through. Then once the drugs wore off instead of leaving and heading back to the concert, you’d become a “doctor” and stay to help the next person to come in the door.
I’m not saying hallucinogens are the answer. I’m saying, there are people all around you who have fought the same fight you’re in battle with right now. There are so many people who have come out on the other side of whatever it is you’re struggling with. It’s so dark and twisty to think you’re at it alone or that you have no options. There are an insane amount of options. Are you hiding from those options by not making yourself visible or relevant? Or are you stepping up, owning your experience and working through them in an efficient way?
You deserve whatever it is you want. You deserve the dream job. You deserve the healthy relationship. You deserve to lose the weight and feel good about yourself. You deserve to live a clean and vibrant life. You deserve to feel happy and excited for your day when you wake up in the morning. And if you don’t think you deserve it, I can almost guarantee you won’t achieve it.
So start by working on making your subconscious aware that you are worthy and deserving. I can tell you that you deserve anything all I want, but nothing changes until you believe it yourself.
Then I challenge you to find someone who has come out on the other side of what it is you’re working through. Reach out and set up a call or a time to grab coffee. This takes great vulnerability and courage. The reward it yields to open yourself up to the perspective of another human being is so powerful and potentially life changing. Even if they don’t provide anything tangible to help you along, it opens up a whole new world to show your subconscious an example of what is possible. So go find someone who has what you want and pick their brain.
Quick point to keep in mind when you are thinking about these people who have what you want: they are the same species as you. They are human beings who put their pants on one leg at a time, just like you and I do. They are not more deserving or worthy than you. They are not better than you for having what you don’t have. They simply have gotten to where you want to be by taking action and pursuing what they want. They didn’t let self-limiting beliefs or their societal programming run the show. They didn't accept their struggles and challenges as a permanent diagnosis. They didn’t let the information their parents and society told them define what they are capable of becoming. Boil it down to be as simple as possible. If they can do it, why can’t you?
You are absolutely playing yourself if you think you’re alone. If you want some support with any or all of this, or tips for reaching out to these expanders - email me at [email protected]
I also want to put out in the universe and your minds that I am launching my very own online courses! I want to make myself more accessible(financially and logistically)to as many people as possible. I know the power of this work and I want to help as many people as possible achieve a life of continuity. Stay tuned for more information on this, I am so %(&^#(&^% excited!